. . . SO WHAT THE HECK IS EYEBALL-PORN-FORK?!?!
What are you serious? Well it's the best game that... But we always... Everyone loves when we...
Okay, for realsies. Eyeball-porn-fork is the best game EVER! It started out as a drinking game in the beer tent at the fringe festival many years ago that we invented with Improvision and a few other friends.
It's like rock-paper-scissors for shots with multiple opponents. We've invented a number of different versions of this game over the years ("moose-water-dynamite" was a personal favorite, but "NRA-NAMBLA-Michael Moore" was not nearly as well received) but we always come back to eyeball-porn-fork.
It's played like rock-paper-scissors in that each person pumps their fist into the middle three times, and on the third time reveals one of the three gestures to determine who wins. But more specifically:
Okay, for realsies. Eyeball-porn-fork is the best game EVER! It started out as a drinking game in the beer tent at the fringe festival many years ago that we invented with Improvision and a few other friends.
It's like rock-paper-scissors for shots with multiple opponents. We've invented a number of different versions of this game over the years ("moose-water-dynamite" was a personal favorite, but "NRA-NAMBLA-Michael Moore" was not nearly as well received) but we always come back to eyeball-porn-fork.
It's played like rock-paper-scissors in that each person pumps their fist into the middle three times, and on the third time reveals one of the three gestures to determine who wins. But more specifically:
EYEBALLMake a circle with your thumb and forefinger, with the remainder of your fingers pointing up. The gesture looks like you could peer through it with one eye, thereby safely staring at the sun during an eclipse or into the girls' locker room. Sometimes called "the okey-dokey."
Eyeball watches porn |
WHAT THE HELL MAN?! HOW DO YOU PLAY WITH MULTIPLE PEOPLE??!!
Everyone takes a drink for each number of times their choice is beaten.
...okay I'll slow it down for you. Here's an example:
Let's say we've got six people playing. ("We've got six people playing!" "Very funny asshole.")
On the count of three they each throw their fists in, and we discover that two people have chosen FORKS, one person has chosen EYEBALL, and three people have chosen PORN.
If there are two forks it means that the single eyeball loses twice and has to take two drinks.
The single eyeball means each person who chose porn lost once and has to take a single drink.
And the three porns mean that each of the forks lost three times, and therefore must take three drinks each.
If you need any more help I will gladly come out to any parties you wish and do the math for you.
...okay I'll slow it down for you. Here's an example:
Let's say we've got six people playing. ("We've got six people playing!" "Very funny asshole.")
On the count of three they each throw their fists in, and we discover that two people have chosen FORKS, one person has chosen EYEBALL, and three people have chosen PORN.
If there are two forks it means that the single eyeball loses twice and has to take two drinks.
The single eyeball means each person who chose porn lost once and has to take a single drink.
And the three porns mean that each of the forks lost three times, and therefore must take three drinks each.
If you need any more help I will gladly come out to any parties you wish and do the math for you.